Roll On 2012

I am going to try to do better, LDs. I really will.

Even if it means that I'll have to leave an open postbox at all times so I can write what I'm thinking so that you don't get too bored with me.

Even if it means that you send me ideas via email or facebook or twits, tumbls, or pony express, I'll try to do something every other day.

Even if it means just a hello and howareya.

I'm working on 2012 being The Year of the Comfortable. Meaning in my own home (cleaning out); my own space (the War Room WILL get done this year); my own body.

This may turn part fatshion blog. So if you don't like hearing about clothes or the like, just don't read those posts (I'll try to warn you *grin*).

This may turn part crafty blog. If knitting or pinterest-inspired craftiness doesn't "do" it for you, just ignore those.

But this will still always be a blog where I can hash out ideas about characters and plot lines...which doesn't seem like I've done much there, either.

Sigh.

But I'm going to try.

Have happy and safe New Year celebrations.

Dreamlet Weekend

Sorry, LDs. I didn't keep track, nor do I remember dreams from this weekend. I'll have a Bitch and Moan postie up later this evening.

Mr Realist is making BBQ chicken kabobs over charcoal this evening, and I'm throwing some shit away (and labeling it) for Saturday's yard sale.

I want to thank each and every one of you, LDs, followers and readers, for your prayers about the job at Camp.

I didn't get it. Not even a call back or an email telling me 'you're not what we're looking for.' Sat in the shower on Saturday afternoon and just cried. I want to every time I think about it. My status on FB that day was "is resigned. Not has, is." Resigned to that it's becoming more and more like I'll be here, in Hell, for the rest of my days. And I hate it.

But I have to be strong.

I have to make a 60-second video telling a panel of judges why they should pick me to spend a Month at the Museum (yeah, I'm entering a cheesy contest *grin*)...without swearing. LDs, do you vote based on content or visuals? I've already gotten my 500-word essay (down to the word!) and the application completed. I'd like have to film, burn, and mail by Monday. Any thoughts?

Heepwah, and be safe out there

Your trying-really-hard-not-to-be-resigned
Ms Dreamer

Dreamlet 29 July 2010

Sorry, LDs. I don't remember what I dreamt about last night. Didn't get home until just after 11pm (gotta love late dart nights), and I had to wind down (reading until almost midnight). Was definitely too tired to remember anything. I don't even think I got up at all.

I did warn you that I have a 300-ring circus for an imagination.

Most of it comes out at night.

I am SO glad it's the weekend.

Aren't you?

Heepwah, and be safe out there

Ms D

Dreamlet 28 July 2010

Ok, LDs. Whatever it is that I'm consuming after 6pm is totally messing up my shiz.

What I had last night between 6 and 10pm:
~2 Bud Select beers (bottles, of course)
~a drink of a potent Jack & Coke
~4 deep-fried chicken strips (awesome) with honey mustard sauce (awesome again)
~a small plate of fresh fried chips
~and a Mountain Dew

I dreamt of Halloween and ghosts and terribly scary things. Costumes on the outside were how the person really was on the inside, and no one was wearing anything cute or non-threatening.
A devil.
A Chinese dragon (those freak me out).
An evil skeleton.

You know how when you're having a bad dream, and you change positions, sometimes your dream will change?

Not last night I didn't. No matter how I tossed and turned, the dream continued.

I love the delicious feeling of fear when you know everything will be ok (like haunted houses. I loves them.); the hair on your arms and neck standing up on end, and you're afraid to look behind you because of what you might see.

But the dreams were so vivid last night that I woke up an hour earlier to pee than my normal nocturnal time (2am instead of 3am)...and I didn't want to get out of bed until I absoballylutely had to.

Ran to the bathroom, peed, and then scampered back to bed (didn't wake up Mr Realist, though. He was out cold.).

I'm getting shivers just thinking about it. *shiver*

~~
Hope everyone's day is going smashingly.

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms D

Dreamlet 27 July 2010

*** Note: you may have noticed that there were two 25 July Dreamlets. I have changed the second to read 26 July. I'm an idiot. That is all. ***

~~
Very weird. See, LDs, about three weeks ago, I smashed my left middle finger (o darn that it had to be 'that' finger) in a SA drop box. Those lids are very, very heavy. It's not broken, but as of now, the nail has separated from the base, but is still attached several other places, so it's not like I can just take it off with some hydrogen peroxide and antibacterial soap...although I wish I could. Anyway, part of my dreams stem from that. O, and I was up an hour early for 'the witching hour.'

Playing basketball with the kids I went to grade school with, but we're all adults. They made the guys play the first half of the game, and they were getting their asses handed to them. A girl on the other team told me she could fix my finger, so we went up top to the first aid station (that looked like a choir loft in a really fancy church) so she could fix it. She strapped my arm down, did some stuff that was only mildly painful (won't go into it...it was kind of gross), and my finger was fine, except for the ache.

~~
Strange thing was, when I woke up about 2am, my finger was aching and I couldn't feel the nail. I was worried that I'd pulled it off in my sleep, but feeling came back and the nail's still there (boo).

Took me forever to get back to sleep, and I never did find out if we won the game or not.

I'm tired today. Tired and grumpy and want to go through more boxes. Think I might tackle the craft box tonight and get it organized (woo boy, that's going to be a fun one!).

Am I the only weird one out there who has dreams like this, or am I the only one crazy enough to post them here?

Told you I have a weird imagination.

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms D

Dreamlet 25 July 2010

Seriously? I have some messed up dreams! I was tossing and turning all night, so there were two distinct dreamlets that I remember.

~~
At work. Bouncing between my current job and my old job.

Having to sit in someone else's messy office and I can't find anything.

There's a tornado coming across the field to the west of us (IRL, it's another factory), and I'm watching Cami (my Chevy Cobalt) get rocked, and then lifted up and slammed through the first floor of plate glass windows (IRL, they're only about half windows that don't open). I've got papers and notes and all kinds of things in my now-destroyed car that are being scattered to the four winds that I have to track down.

Guess who's fault it is that my car is now inside my workplace?

Mine.

~~
2nd sleep:

Remember the friend I'm having dinner with? It had to get moved to this Wednesday due to work conflicts. So...

Mr Realist and I are on the way to Decatur (for why, I don't know), and I decided that we're going to stop off and check out this little hole-in-the-wall diner. We poke around, and E pulls into the small gravel lot. I give him a big hug, and introduce him to Mr Realist; they get along and Mr R doesn't want to kill him.

We have dinner, then E has things for me - all duck stuff (I collect them...or I used to. Have too many). So I get my things and Mr Realist and I head out. No conflict, no worries.

~~
I'm such a weirdo. I'll have a Bitch and Moan Monday for you later.

Just had to get these out before I forgot.

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms D

Dreamlet 24 July 2010

My apologies, LDs, for not posting one on Friday. I rightly don't remember dreaming anything. But last night?

Was. A. Weird'un.

~~

I'm a military pilot (yeah, right!). I have to fly to this village where children are being stalked by closet monsters and they can leave the house, but they can't move away. I remember closet doors that slid shut, paper mache (yeah, probably not spelled right) decorations in rainbow colors, four flights of stairs, and a quick change from flight uniform to doctor scrubs.

And I swear I did not do acid Saturday night.

Might have been the loads of bleu cheese I had on my salad at Lone Star for Mumsy Dreamer's 51st birthday (Mr Realist and I took her to supper). That shiz'll mess you up, LDs. :)

~~

Got to see FIL and s-MIL today - went to supper at the pizza place uptown.

Hope your weekend was fab!

Heepwah, and be safe out there

Your quite strange

Ms D

Dreamlet 22 July 2010

Geena Davis (have no idea why)

...and that's really the only thing about my dreams last night that I remember. Kinda sad, huh?

I'd like to be able to write them down, but I'm not fully awake yet when I do get up, and I can't see to write in the dark. Boo.

Is anyone else looking forward to the weekend as much as I am? Sheesh.

And I think I'm going to have to resign myself to the fact that I'm not qualified to do anything more than what I'm doing now. I haven't heard from the camp, and I even emailed the hiring director on Tuesday...no response at all, not even a "we're still reviewing resumes."

I'm trying quite hard not to think about that today.

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms D

Dreamlet 21 July 2010

** Nothing in particular. It was all sketchy this morning.

Running from something.

Performing in front of people.

A man, caressing his fingers down the inside of her arm.

Spirits.

"I'll wait. Forever, if I have to."

"I'm not really here."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm a two-worlder. Caught between here and after."

"Sarah?"
"Who's Sarah?"
"Sorry. I thought you were someone else."
"I'm Kristin. What's your name?"
"A-Alan. You look so much like her...."

"I love you."
"You can't."
"Because? Oh. That."

~~
Weird, huh?

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms. D

Dreamlet 20 July 2010

I'll give you this disclaimer. It might be disjointed, and you might need an explanation (and I'll give you one if I have one), but this is how I dream:

** Mr Realist and I had a discussion last night. I'd been invited to dinner by a friend from high school that I haven't seen in more than ten years (and yes, it's a guy). I'm going, but Mr Realist wasn't invited. E is in Decatur for the next six weeks working on a job (he's a pipeliner), and he just wants to catch up. E is married. Mr Realist wasn't too thrilled that he wasn't invited. The last time we did something with a friend from high school, it was incredibly awkward, and they both felt left out because I was trying to keep them both included, and it wasn't working because they had nothing in common. Before you tell me that I shouldn't be going at all, know this: friends from high school who have made the effort to keep in touch or get back in touch deserve communication. And if they're close enough, dinner or lunch or coffee is what we do. I'm not an idiot.

~~
Sitting at the restaurant (mind you, it's in the town. I. Live. In. It's not like I'm going to a hotel bar...sheesh), E and I are laughing about something stupid someone did in hs when Mr Realist and a friend comes in. They're seated across the room, and Mr Realist keeps staring...until I notice him. He comes over.

me: "You followed me?"
him: "You were the one who told me where you were going. That's your fault."
me: "I was right. You don't trust me."
him: "Well, you are a passionate woman and you said you had a thing for him in high school."
me: "Are you serious? You could go out after work with the girls to the bar, especially when Tits was still there, and she hit all over you and I trusted you and I was just supposed to be ok with it?! I didn't follow you - I just called to see when you would be home. Oh, and I was just supposed to be ok when you drove home fucking drunk, and you thought it was funny? Fuck this."

And that's all I remembered when I woke up this morning.

Not pleasant, I know. But it's a dreamlet.

As I do this, I might include notes of stories that I'm working on.

What are you dreaming about?

Heepwah, and be safe out there

Ms D

Dreamlets

I've been pondering this one, LDs. And I think I'm going to have to document. For the next week, when I wake up, I'll write down what I remember dreaming about.

This should give you insight to what I mean by the "300-ring circus of my imagination."

That is all.

Heepwah, and be safe out there.

Ms Dreamer